Life is messy

I'm kind of a mess right now. There has been so much loss with the tornadoes that hit in Arkansas, I've been dealing with my own things right now, and I just feel different.
My husband and I were so lucky that the tornadoes missed us. We were laying in bed with our puppy watching Netflix. And, honestly, I feel awful about that. So many people lost everything and I was untouched. Sometimes I feel like God is saving me for something great, but I find it hard to believe. I just don't feel great or like I have anything valuable to offer. But God spared us for some reason. I just can't figure out what for.
One of our dear friends lost everything. She lost her home, her two children, and her and her husband are both in the hospital in serious condition. She is the epitome of God's servant. She is the greatest woman I've known. Give this a read. Your mind will explode from how awesome she is.

http://thehodgepodgedarling.blogspot.com/2014/04/the-cheerleader.html

Here's the deal with me. I've had this condition called erythema nodosum for about  7 years. It's really painful and just a pain in the butt. With this, I usually get this red lumps, hot to the touch, and they are very painful. They usually get bigger the longer I have them. I also get a fever ranging from 99.5-101. It hurts to walk sometimes, to roll over in bed, to bend over, take a shower, etc. I usually get them once a year. Once I notice them starting to pop up I go to a doctor and get some steroids to help with the swelling and then I'm back to normal in a few weeks. They're a very strange thing.

http://www.webmd.com/skin-problems-and-treatments/erythema-nodosum

I have been to the doctor twice for these. I was given the usual medicine, but it didn't work. She we tried a stronger dose. That didn't work. My doctor didn't know what else to do for me so he sent me to a dermatologist. I thought that was a stupid idea. I've been to one before, and they had no idea what was wrong with me.
I had my appointment yesterday, and it went well. The dermatologist took some pictures and asked some good questions. She decided the best way to know what is causing these painful bumps is to do a biopsy. I was nervous, but it made sense to do one. They numbed up one of the spots (which felt great since they've been hurting so much!), and took a part of the skin to send to UAMS, then I got 2 stitches. It didn't hurt at all.
I've just been so worried. I mean part of my skin is being analyzed for a disease. This is serious. I'm kind of freaking out, but I'm trying to remember that God is in control. He's got this. I'm on the edge just thinking about the worst.
If you get a chance, just say a prayer for the tornado victims and a little one for me too.